Talking about neurodivergence at home
We love learning about neurodiversity and sharing resources with our kids. We always remember that our kids are the experts on their own experience. We also know that they need models and language to anchor their experience in the world of others, so that they know they’re not alone. Siblings and other peers can likewise benefit from understanding more about neurodivergence. Some guidelines we use when introducing concepts of neurodiversity to kids at PlayGroup can be useful at home too!
Express curiosity. Talk about how wondrous it is that brains and experiences can be different! Explore how we know (or don’t) what other people are experiencing. “I think this brick wall is red, but I wonder if it might look more brown to someone else. What color does it look like to you?” Try exploring some optical illusions together and discuss how different interpretations can still be “correct.”
Avoid extremes. The framing that neurodiversity is a “problem” that needs to be “fixed” through corrective therapies is very harmful. If all that neurodiverse kids and their peers ever hear anyone talking about is “therapy” in connection with neurodiversity, they get a skewed picture of their own inherent value. On the flipside, minimizing the challenges faced by neurodiverse kids in a world not built for them (by using euphemistic language, etc.) can also be extremely confusing and isolating. Use clear and accurate language.
Read and discuss books like the ones on this list from PBS Kids. Talk with all of the kids in the group (neurodiverse and neurotypical) about how their experiences may be similar or different from the characters in the book. Emphasize that every individual is unique, no matter what their neurotype. Understanding neurodiversity, helps to build perspective taking skills!
Take turns trying things that others in the group enjoy. It’s important to model curiosity in these explorations. Maybe something doesn’t sound fun at all, but could we try it? Is there a part of the activity we could try? Maybe we confirm that some of us really don’t like doing the same things, but did we learn more about each other? Let’s keep trying to find more things we all enjoy doing together!